I’ve gone from type-A lawyer to grounded calm mom from using mindset and personal development tools over the last handful of years, and this transformation is one that I’m so very proud of. If you’re a high achieving mom who wants to create more calm and balance, I got you. In this post, I’m sharing how you can use mindset tools as a type-A mom to become the mom you want to be, no matter what’s going on in your life.

What Is A Type-A Mom? Signs You Might Be One

A Type-A mom is someone who thrives on structure, organization, and achievement. She’s the mom who’s always setting goals, maintaining high standards, and often juggling multiple tasks at once. While these traits can be powerful strengths, they can also lead to feelings of overwhelm, burnout, and stress when the demands of motherhood don’t fit into her carefully crafted plans.

Here are some signs you might be a Type-A mom:

  1. Perfectionism is Your Default
    You constantly feel the need to do everything perfectly, whether it’s managing your career, keeping a spotless home, or ensuring your kids are thriving in every area. Anything less than “perfect” feels like failure.
  2. You’re Highly Organized (Almost to a Fault)
    Lists, schedules, and routines are your lifeline. You plan out your day down to the minute, and you struggle when things don’t go according to plan.
  3. You Struggle with Delegating Tasks
    It’s hard for you to ask for help or trust others to do things right. You’d rather take on all the responsibilities yourself to ensure everything meets your standards.
  4. You’re Always Pushing Yourself to Do More
    You constantly feel like you need to be productive and maximize every minute. Relaxing or doing something just for fun often feels like a waste of time, and you sometimes struggle with guilt when you’re not “doing enough.”
  5. You’re Driven by Achievement and Success
    You set ambitious goals and are highly motivated by external success, whether it’s in your career, family life, or personal development. You’re always striving for that next accomplishment.
  6. Overthinking and Overplanning Are Your Norm
    Your mind is always racing with what needs to be done next. You plan and overanalyze situations, often getting stuck in “what if” scenarios and worrying about things outside of your control.

If any of these traits sound familiar, you may identify with the Type-A personality in motherhood. While these characteristics can help you excel in many areas, they can also make it challenging to find calm, balance, and joy in the present moment. The good news is, with the right mindset tools, you can learn to embrace a more peaceful, flexible approach to motherhood while still being the driven, high-achieving mom you are.

Why Type-A Moms Struggle With Balance And Calm

Type-A moms are often known for their drive, ambition, and high standards. These traits can help you excel in many areas of life, but they can also make finding balance and calm in motherhood a real challenge. The intense focus on productivity and achievement, while beneficial in a career setting, can lead to stress, overwhelm, and a constant feeling of not doing enough when it comes to parenting.

Here’s why Type-A moms may find it particularly difficult to achieve the calm and balance:

1. Perfectionism And Unrealistic Expectations

Type-A moms tend to set extremely high standards for themselves and their families. Whether it’s having a perfectly clean home, ensuring the kids eat healthy meals every day, or managing a full-time job, you often expect perfection in every area. This mindset creates pressure, making it difficult to relax or accept that some things won’t go exactly as planned. When expectations are set too high, any deviation can lead to frustration and stress.

2. Difficulty Letting Go Of Control

Type-A moms like to have control over every situation, from organizing the family schedule to making decisions about their children’s education and extracurriculars. However, motherhood is unpredictable, and learning to let go of control is essential for maintaining calm. Struggles arise when you have difficulty accepting that you can’t manage or predict every outcome. This constant need to be in control can prevent them from feeling at ease, especially when things go off track.

Resources:

3. Overcommitment And Burnout

High-achieving moms often take on more than they can handle, believing you must excel at both parenting and personal or professional goals. You may overcommit to activities, volunteer roles, or projects, leaving little time for self-care or downtime. This constant “doing” leads to burnout, where exhaustion replaces joy, and the ability to find balance or peace feels impossible.

Self Care Resources:

4. Struggles With Delegating

Because Type-A moms often want things done a specific way, you can struggle with delegating tasks to your spouse, family members, or even hired help. This adds to your mental and emotional load, as you feel responsible for everything from household chores to managing family events. Learning to delegate is key to achieving balance, but for many Type-A moms, letting go of tasks feels uncomfortable or anxiety-inducing.

5. Overthinking And Worry

Type-A moms are often plagued by overthinking. Whether it’s worrying about making the “right” decisions for your children or replaying conversations in your head, you can find it hard to switch off your thoughts. This constant mental chatter makes it difficult to stay present and calm. Overthinking can also lead to anxiety, especially when decisions don’t go as planned or when things feel out of your control.

Resources:

6. Striving For External Validation

Type-A personalities are often motivated by external markers of success—praise, recognition, and achievement. This mindset can carry over into motherhood, where you may feel pressure to meet societal expectations or appear as the “perfect mom” in the eyes of others. However, seeking validation from outside sources creates unnecessary stress and anxiety, making it harder to find personal peace and satisfaction.

7. Difficulty Slowing Down

For Type-A moms, slowing down can feel counterintuitive. You’re often wired to stay busy, multitask, and maximize your productivity. However, this constant go-go-go mindset leaves little room for rest, reflection, or simply being present with your family. Learning to slow down and embrace stillness can feel uncomfortable, but it’s crucial for achieving balance and calm.

Common Mindset Traps For Type-A Moms: Perfectionism, Comparison, People Pleasing, And Overthinking

Type-A moms often fall into mindset traps that can hinder their ability to find balance and calm. Here are some of the most common:

1. Perfectionism

The constant pursuit of perfection can lead to frustration and burnout. When things don’t go exactly as planned, perfectionist tendencies make it hard to let go or adapt.

2. Comparison

Comparing yourself to other moms or families can spark feelings of inadequacy. Social media can amplify this trap, making it easy to feel like you’re falling short in areas where others seem to excel.

3. People Pleasing

Trying to meet everyone’s expectations—whether it’s your partner, family, or society—can drain your energy and push your own needs to the background. This often leads to resentment and exhaustion.

4. Overthinking

Type-A moms tend to overanalyze every decision, replay conversations, or stress about “what if” scenarios. This habit creates mental clutter and prevents them from being fully present.

Recognizing these traps is the first step to shifting your mindset, letting go of stress, and embracing more ease in your day-to-day life.

Midset Resources:

How To Reframe Your Mindset: Simple Tips For Type-A Moms

As a Type-A mom, you may feel like you’re always striving to do more, be more, and achieve more, often at the expense of your own peace and happiness. The key to finding calm and balance lies in reframing your mindset—learning to shift your thoughts away from perfectionism and control toward acceptance, flexibility, and self-compassion. Here are some simple tips to help you start reframing your mindset:

1. Focus On Progress, Not Perfection

Perfectionism is a common trait of Type-A personalities, but striving for perfection often leads to frustration and burnout. Instead of aiming for flawlessness, try focusing on progress and growth. Celebrate small wins, and recognize that even incremental improvements are valuable. Remind yourself that doing your best is enough, even if things don’t turn out perfectly.

  • Reframe: Instead of thinking, “I need to get everything right,” try thinking, “I’m making progress, and that’s enough.”

2. Embrace Flexibility Over Control

Type-A moms often thrive on control and structure, but motherhood is full of unpredictability. Learning to embrace flexibility can help you reduce stress when things don’t go according to plan. When schedules change or obstacles arise, practice letting go and adjusting with ease rather than getting caught up in what should have happened.

  • Reframe: Swap “I must stick to the plan” with “I can adapt and adjust, and everything will still be okay.”

3. Practice Self-Compassion

High-achieving moms are often their own toughest critics. Instead of beating yourself up for not meeting your high standards, try offering yourself the same kindness and understanding you would give to a friend. Remind yourself that you’re doing your best in a demanding role, and it’s okay to have off days.

  • Reframe: Replace “I’m failing” with “I’m learning and growing, just like everyone else.”

4. Shift From “Doing” To “Being”

Type-A moms tend to place their worth in productivity and accomplishments, but sometimes the most valuable thing you can do is simply be. Slow down and savor the present moment—whether that’s enjoying a cuddle with your child, taking a mindful breath, or sitting quietly for a few minutes without a to-do list. This shift from constant doing to mindful being can help you experience more joy in the everyday moments of motherhood.

  • Reframe: Shift from “I need to stay busy to be productive” to “It’s okay to simply be and enjoy the moment.”

Planning And Time Management Resources:

5. Use Positive Self-Talk

The way you talk to yourself has a powerful impact on your mindset. Instead of letting negative or critical thoughts dominate, replace them with positive, empowering affirmations. This practice can shift your mindset over time, helping you feel more confident, capable, and at peace with where you are.

  • Reframe: Turn “I’m not good enough” into “I’m doing my best, and that’s more than enough.”

6. Set Boundaries To Protect Your Peace

Being a Type-A mom often means saying “yes” to too many things and overloading yourself with commitments. Setting boundaries is essential for preserving your energy and mental well-being. Practice saying “no” to tasks or obligations that don’t align with your priorities or that will push you toward burnout.

  • Reframe: Instead of thinking, “I have to do everything,” think, “I can say no and protect my peace.”

Mindset As A Daily Practice: Tools To Help You Shift Your Thinking

For Type-A moms, mindset work isn’t a one-time fix—it’s a daily practice that helps you navigate the challenges of motherhood with more calm, balance, and self-compassion. Developing a mindset practice allows you to be intentional about how you think, react, and show up each day. Here are some powerful tools to help you make mindset work a consistent part of your life:

1. Morning Mindset Rituals

Starting your day with a few moments dedicated to your mindset can set a positive tone for the rest of the day. This might include affirmations, meditation, deep breathing, or simply taking a few moments to reflect on what you’re grateful for. A morning mindset ritual can help you focus your energy on what truly matters before the day’s demands take over.

  • Try This: Spend 5 minutes each morning repeating positive affirmations like, “I am calm, capable, and present,” or take deep breaths while visualizing a peaceful, productive day ahead.

2. Mantras For Busy Moments

Throughout the day, life can throw a lot at you—whether it’s a last-minute deadline or your toddler’s tantrum. Having a go-to mantra can help you stay grounded and reframe your mindset in stressful moments. Mantras are short, powerful statements that reinforce a positive thought or attitude.

  • Try This: In moments of overwhelm, repeat a calming mantra like, “I can handle this” or “I choose peace over perfection.” Saying it to yourself a few times can shift your thinking and reduce stress.

DOWNLOAD MY FREE GUIDE: 10 Mindset Mantras For Moms

3. Mindfulness Breaks

Mindfulness is a key practice for shifting your mindset because it helps you become aware of your thoughts and feelings without judgment. By tuning into the present moment, you can interrupt negative thought patterns before they spiral out of control. Take short mindfulness breaks throughout the day to reset your mind and refocus.

  • Try This: When you feel overwhelmed, pause for a minute, take a few deep breaths, and bring your awareness to the present. Notice how you feel in your body and what’s happening around you. This simple act can help you reset your mindset.

Mindfulness Resources:

4. Journaling for Self-Reflection

Journaling is one of the most effective tools for processing thoughts, emotions, and experiences. Writing regularly can help you gain clarity on your mindset, identify patterns in your thinking, and consciously choose new ways to respond. It’s also a powerful way to set intentions and track your personal growth over time.

  • Try This: Dedicate 10 minutes at the start of your day to journaling. Reflect on your thoughts and experiences, and write down one mindset shift you want to make for the day.

DOWNLOAD 75 FREE JOURNAL PROMPTS FOR MOMS HERE.

5. Gratitude Practice

Gratitude is a simple yet transformative practice that helps shift your mindset from scarcity and stress to abundance and appreciation. By regularly focusing on what you’re grateful for, you can train your brain to notice the positives rather than dwelling on what’s going wrong.

  • Try This: Each day, write down three things you have that you want to keep having. For example, “I want to be married to Steve.” This shows me wanting something I already have and puts me into a state of gratitude. They don’t have to be big; even small things can have a powerful impact on your mindset.

6. Daily Reflection Questions

Asking yourself intentional questions at the end of each day is a great way to check in on your mindset and notice areas where you might need to reframe your thinking. These reflection questions can help you process any stress, celebrate your wins, and set the tone for the next day.

  • Try This: Before bed, ask yourself questions like, “What went well today?” “How did I handle stress?” or “What mindset shift would have helped me today?” Reflect on your answers, and consider how you can apply those insights moving forward.

7. BONUS: Mindset Course

Taking a mindset course is a great way to improve your mindset and your life. I have a mindset course called the Inner Work Framework that you get inside my membership. Learn all about it here: Mom On Purpose Membership (with Mindset Course).

A Final Note

Becoming more calm and balanced is not only possible as a type-A mom, but it’s not as hard as it seems. I remember feeling like I would always be wound tight, and it just wasn’t true! These tools helped me expand my capacity to experience so much more calm and balance (among other things) in my every day life. I still have the part of me that is ambitious, high achieving, and career driven, but now I can shift back and forth between the feminine and masculine, turning up or down the dials that serve me best depending on what role I’m in and what I’m doing. Keep going on this journey, my friend! It is work worth doing.