As a mom who loves personal development, having a growth mindset is one of my favorite tools for motherhood. Here’s why, with a growth mindset, you empower your kids to navigate challenges, believe in themselves, and figure anything out. With the opposite (a fixed mindset), your kids will feel stuck, hopeless, and like their life is happening to them. So, how can you get started with a growth mindset as a mom? Let’s dive in!

Understanding The Growth Mindset

A growth mindset, a term coined by psychologist Carol Dweck, is the belief that abilities and intelligence can be developed with effort, learning, and persistence.

In contrast, a fixed mindset assumes that our abilities are static and unchangeable. It’s the old “I am this way and I can’t change” attitude.

Embracing a growth mindset as a mom can lead to remarkable personal growth and a more fulfilling parenting experience.

Here are some of the benefits of having a growth mindset as a mom:

1. Enhances Resilience and Adaptability

  • Resilience in the Face of Challenges: A growth mindset empowers moms to view challenges as opportunities to learn and grow rather than as insurmountable obstacles. This perspective fosters resilience, allowing moms to bounce back from setbacks more quickly and effectively.
  • Adaptability: Life as a mom can be unpredictable. A growth mindset encourages adaptability and flexibility, making it easier to navigate unexpected changes and adjust to new situations.

2. Encourages Lifelong Learning and Improvement

  • Continuous Self-Improvement: Moms with a growth mindset are more likely to engage in lifelong learning. They seek out new knowledge, skills, and experiences that enhance their personal and professional lives.
  • Role Modeling for Children: By demonstrating a commitment to learning and self-improvement, moms inspire their children to adopt similar attitudes. This creates a culture of growth and development within the family. Up Next: How To Be A More Patient Mom (blog post)

3. Fosters a Positive Outlook on Challenges

  • Opportunity Over Obstacle: A growth mindset shifts the focus from viewing challenges as threats to seeing them as opportunities for development. This positive outlook reduces stress and anxiety, making it easier to tackle problems with confidence.
  • Problem-Solving Skills: Embracing challenges as learning opportunities enhances problem-solving skills. Moms become more creative and resourceful in finding solutions to everyday issues.

4. Builds Confidence and Self-Efficacy

  • Increased Confidence: A growth mindset boosts self-confidence by reinforcing the belief that abilities can be developed through effort and practice. This confidence spills over into various aspects of life, from parenting to career pursuits.
  • Self-Efficacy: Believing in one’s ability to improve and succeed enhances self-efficacy. Moms feel more capable and empowered to take on new challenges and achieve their goals.

5. Enhances Emotional Well-Being

  • Reduced Fear of Failure: With a growth mindset, the fear of failure diminishes. Moms learn to see failure as a natural part of the learning process, which reduces anxiety and fosters a healthier relationship with setbacks.
  • Greater Emotional Resilience: The ability to learn from mistakes and view them as opportunities for growth enhances emotional resilience. Moms are better equipped to handle stress and maintain a positive outlook during difficult times.

6. Improves Relationships and Communication

  • Open to Feedback: A growth mindset encourages openness to feedback and constructive criticism. This improves communication with partners, children, and others, leading to healthier and more supportive relationships.
  • Empathy and Understanding: Understanding that everyone is capable of growth fosters empathy and patience. Moms become more understanding and supportive of their children’s and partners’ efforts and challenges. Up next: Marriage Communication (podcast)

7. Promotes a Balanced Approach to Success

  • Value of Effort Over Innate Ability: A growth mindset emphasizes the importance of effort and persistence over inherent talent. This balanced approach to success teaches children to value hard work and perseverance, which are crucial for long-term achievement.
  • Healthy Work-Life Balance: By focusing on growth and development, moms can set realistic goals and priorities. This leads to a healthier work-life balance, reducing burnout and promoting overall well-being.

All of this sounds great, but what you might find even more persuasive are the problems associated with having a fixed mindset.

Here are some of the negative impacts of a fixed mindset on parenting:

1. Limiting Children’s Potential

  • Discouraging Effort: A mom with a fixed mindset might emphasize innate talent over effort. This can lead children to believe that their abilities are fixed and that effort won’t make a difference. As a result, they might not try as hard or persevere through challenges.
  • Fear of Failure: Children might develop a fear of failure because they believe it reflects their fixed abilities. This fear can prevent them from taking risks, trying new things, and learning from mistakes.

2. Poor Response to Challenges and Setbacks

  • Avoidance of Challenges: A fixed mindset might lead a mom to avoid challenging situations, both for herself and her children. This avoidance can limit opportunities for growth and learning.
  • Negative Reaction to Mistakes: Viewing mistakes as a reflection of fixed abilities can lead to harsh self-criticism or criticism of children when they fail. This can damage self-esteem and hinder learning from experiences.

3. Ineffective Praise and Feedback

  • Praising Intelligence Over Effort: A fixed mindset often involves praising children for their intelligence or talent rather than their effort and strategies. This type of praise can make children more concerned with appearing smart than with learning and growing.
  • Fixed Feedback: Feedback might be less constructive and more judgmental. Instead of focusing on how to improve, feedback might simply label behaviors or abilities as good or bad. Up next: 15 Ways To Be A Better Mom (blog post)

4. Stagnation in Personal Development

  • Resistance to Self-Improvement: A mom with a fixed mindset might resist opportunities for personal growth and self-improvement, believing that her abilities are unchangeable. This stagnation can lead to frustration and a lack of fulfillment.
  • Poor Role Modeling: Children learn by observing their parents. A mom who demonstrates a fixed mindset might inadvertently teach her children to adopt the same mindset, limiting their growth potential.

5. Strain on Parent-Child Relationship

  • High Expectations Without Support: A fixed mindset might lead to setting high, unrealistic expectations without providing the necessary support and encouragement. This can create tension and a sense of inadequacy in children.
  • Lack of Empathy and Understanding: A fixed mindset can make it harder to empathize with children’s struggles and challenges. Without understanding that abilities can be developed, a mom might be less patient and supportive. Check out this podcast I did on How To Parent A Disrespectful Teenager here.

So, with all of that said, cultivating a growth mindset isn’t just interesting—it’s necessary to show up as the mom you want to be and equip your kids for navigating the future.

How A Growth Mindset Impacts Parenting

When you have a growth mindset as a mom, you’ll see that it impacts your parenting in these three ways.

Modeling Behavior. Children are keen observers. When they see you tackle challenges with optimism and determination, they learn to adopt the same attitude.

Encouraging Effort Over Results. Praise your children’s efforts, strategies, and progress. This teaches them that hard work and perseverance are more important than inherent talent.

Handling Challenges. With a growth mindset, parenting challenges become opportunities for learning rather than insurmountable obstacles. This perspective helps you remain calm and resourceful during tough times.

This is why it’s SO important to adopt a growth mindset for your kids. It sets them up for life!

Resources:

Tips For Developing A Growth Mindset

Here are five tips for successfully developing a growth mindset:

1. Embrace Challenges. View challenges as opportunities to grow rather than threats. Approach them with curiosity and determination.

2. Learn from Criticism. Constructive criticism is a valuable tool for growth. Use it to refine your strategies and improve your skills.

3. Celebrate Small Wins. Recognize and celebrate small achievements along the way. This reinforces the value of progress and keeps you motivated.

4. Continuous Learning. Commit to lifelong learning. Whether through books, courses, or new experiences, continuously seek knowledge and self-improvement.

5. Positive Self-Talk. Maintain a positive inner dialogue. Replace self-doubt with affirmations that reinforce your growth potential.

Growth Mindset Resources:

Practical Activities To Cultivate A Growth Mindset

So, what does it look like in your busy life to actually DO this? Here are some personal development activities you can use to change your mindset to a growth mindset:

1. Journaling. Reflect on your experiences and growth through journaling. Use prompts like “What did I learn today?” or “How did I overcome a challenge this week?” Inside the Mom On Purpose Membership you get 1) a journaling course, 2) new weekly journal prompts, and 3) 24/7 written coaching for accountability from me (Natalie). Learn more about Mom On Purpose here.

2. Mindfulness and Meditation. Practice mindfulness to stay present and centered. Meditation can help you develop a calm and focused mindset.

3. Reading and Learning. Explore books and resources on growth mindset and personal development. Some recommendations include Carol Dweck’s “Mindset” and Angela Duckworth’s “Grit.”

4. Listen to Podcasts. The Mom On Purpose With Natalie Bacon podcast is perfect for helping you create and cultivate a growth mindset to show up as the mom you want to be.

Listen here: Apple | Spotify | Website

Additional Resources:

Incorporating Growth Mindset Principles In Family Life

To incorporate a growth mindset into your family, here are some great ways to get started:

1. Family Activities that Encourage a Growth Mindset

  • Learning Together: Engage in activities that challenge the entire family, such as learning a new language, cooking a new recipe, or taking up a new sport. Emphasize the process of learning and improvement over immediate success.
  • Creative Projects: Encourage creativity through family art projects, building projects, or DIY crafts. Focus on the enjoyment and learning that comes from creating something together, rather than the final product.
  • Example: The family decides to learn how to play a musical instrument together. Each member practices regularly, and they celebrate small improvements and performances, regardless of skill level.

2. Open Communication

  • Discussing Mindset Concepts: Have regular family discussions about the differences between a growth mindset and a fixed mindset. Use real-life examples from school, work, or personal experiences to illustrate these concepts.
  • Sharing Experiences: Encourage each family member to share their daily challenges and how they overcame them. This helps normalize the idea that everyone faces difficulties and can grow from them.
  • Example: During dinner, each family member shares a challenge they faced that day and how they dealt with it. This encourages open discussion about problem-solving and learning from experiences.

3. Goal Setting and Celebrating Progress

  • Family Goal Setting: Set collective goals as a family, such as improving fitness levels, saving for a family vacation, or completing a community service project. Break these goals into smaller, manageable steps and celebrate milestones along the way.
  • Individual Goals: Encourage each family member to set personal goals. Provide support and encouragement, and celebrate their progress and effort, regardless of the outcome.
  • Example: The family sets a goal to run a 5K together. They create a training plan, track their progress, and celebrate milestones, such as completing the first week of training or running a certain distance without stopping.

4. Embracing and Learning from Mistakes

  • Creating a Safe Environment: Foster an environment where mistakes are seen as learning opportunities. When someone makes a mistake, discuss what can be learned from the experience and how to improve next time.
  • Sharing Mistakes: Share your own mistakes with your children and discuss what you learned from them. This models vulnerability and the growth mindset principle that mistakes are a natural part of learning.
  • Example: A child spills milk while pouring it into a glass. Instead of getting upset, the parent calmly helps the child clean up and discusses how to be more careful next time.

5. Encouraging Persistence and Effort

  • Recognizing Effort: Praise the effort and persistence of your children rather than just the results. For example, say, “I’m proud of how hard you worked on your science project,” instead of, “You’re so smart.”
  • Teaching Strategies for Perseverance: Provide strategies for overcoming obstacles, such as breaking tasks into smaller steps, seeking help when needed, and staying focused on long-term goals.
  • Example: A child struggles with a math problem. The parent praises their effort and helps them break down the problem into smaller steps, encouraging them to keep trying until they understand it. Up next: A Beginners Guide To Wellness For Moms (blog post).

6. Creating a Positive Learning Environment

  • Encouraging Exploration: Encourage your children to explore their interests and try new things, even if they find them challenging. Support their curiosity and the learning process.
  • Providing Resources: Offer resources like books, educational toys, and access to extracurricular activities that promote learning and growth.
  • Example: The family dedicates a space in the home for learning and creativity, filled with books, art supplies, and educational games. This environment encourages exploration and continuous learning.

7. Modeling Growth Mindset Behavior

  • Demonstrating Growth Mindset: Show your children how you apply a growth mindset in your own life. Talk about your own challenges, how you overcome them, and what you learn from them.
  • Practicing Self-Compassion: Model self-compassion by being kind to yourself when things don’t go as planned. Show that it’s okay to not be perfect and that growth comes from perseverance and learning.
  • Example: A parent talks about a work project that didn’t go as planned and how they plan to improve next time. This shows children that adults also face challenges and learn from them.

A Final Note

Developing a growth mindset as a mom not only enhances your personal growth but also positively influences your children. By embracing challenges, learning from criticism, and celebrating small wins, you can cultivate a mindset that empowers you and your family to thrive.